their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
My first STD was from a foam party
Screwed.edu
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I want to be your penis for a week.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
