Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
zippers are such a cool invention
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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