so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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