like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize