I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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