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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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