i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
