i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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