Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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