Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
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i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
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He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in