Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
