Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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