but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize