I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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