So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
babies were throwing up all over the place
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
