Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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