that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize
