dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Randomize
