im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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