dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
he puts the penis in happiness.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Randomize