Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
where are my eyebrows?
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