I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
