It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
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so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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