Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
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