I just saw a hot homeless man
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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