why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
