im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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