Dude my mom stole all your condoms
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Randomize
