You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
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