Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
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There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
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I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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