The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Randomize
