She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
