He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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