It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
