Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
