this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
you win again, gameday.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
