Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...

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(603): no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us... http://tfl.nu/rs9m

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.

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(405): It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him. http://tfl.nu/10ee

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(727): View more from Florida

Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...

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(727): Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons... http://tfl.nu/8jcz

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(310): View more from California

the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.

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(310): the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him. http://tfl.nu/jidd

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(775): View more from Nevada

He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.

(856): View more from New Jersey

Restraining orders are what college is about.

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(775): He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it. (856): Restraining orders are what college is about. http://tfl.nu/sfmu

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(505): View more from New Mexico

I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge

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(505): I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge http://tfl.nu/o9mq

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(856): View more from New Jersey

I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do

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(856): I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do http://tfl.nu/mquj

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(330): View more from Ohio

literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.

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(330): literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs. http://tfl.nu/r48u

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(519): View more from Ontario

My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things

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(519): My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things http://tfl.nu/16j6

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(214): View more from Texas

There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.

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(214): There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me. http://tfl.nu/ecsp

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(270): View more from Kentucky

you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.

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(270): you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you. http://tfl.nu/d78n

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(402): View more from Nebraska

He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.

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(402): He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help. http://tfl.nu/brln

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(417): View more from Missouri

New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.

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(417): New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel. http://tfl.nu/qpdx

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(514): View more from Quebec

Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.

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(514): Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night. http://tfl.nu/qzgt

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(931): View more from Tennessee

I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand

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(931): I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand http://tfl.nu/pke8

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