Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Randomize
Follow @tfln