i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
