It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
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