We got so high we made milksteak
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
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