Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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