i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
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He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
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I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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