He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
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