he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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