yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
