apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
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I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
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