You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
