i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
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