i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Randomize
