I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Please don't give away my fajitas
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
