so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
