arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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